


Fast Cars

by OnyxSoul



Series: ByRoads - Trager [1]
Category: Mayans M.C. (TV), Sons of Anarchy, Sons of Anarchy (Comics), Veronica Mars (TV), Veronica Mars - All Media Types
Genre: Based in the past, ByRoad Series, Dangerous Stunts, Detail Violence, F/M, Fear of Dolls (Pediophobia), Implied abuse, Kidnapping, Mention of abuse, Multi, Older Man/Younger Woman, Triggers, Violence, cursing, mostly childhood, stupid stunts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-30
Updated: 2019-01-30
Packaged: 2019-10-19 14:10:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17602814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OnyxSoul/pseuds/OnyxSoul
Summary: Ever wonder about Tig's past? Why is he scared of Dolls? What about his and Kozik's relationship? How did they go from best friends to hating each other?This is the story of the two's past, along with their younger siblings. Told in the youngest sibling of Tig prospective.This is the first installment of the ByRoad series which is basically any crime based show slam into one universe.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I am moving my Tumblr Series here so if it is deleted it isn't lost. Since Tumblr is taking NSFW stuff down this might be since it does have some graphic senses. Some sexual and many violent ones.

 

 

_**You got a fast car** _

_**I want a ticket to anywhere** _

 

**YEAR:** 1974

**AGE:** Infant

 

* * *

 

 

A young boy, about eleven, and a boy a little older than five watched woman in the next room. The woman was dancing around the kitchen with a tiny baby in her arms. Bruises on the pre-teen’s face which stung when cool air hit it. His bright blue eyes looked away to where they could hear the man coming into the house.

 

The slur of the voice, he scoffed, glaring at his father. The man smelled of smoke and alcohol. “What happened to you?” The man slurred. Growing up with the man with the nasty habits, the boy had learned to understand the drunk and high slurs.

 

Looking for the woman who was lost in the daze of dancing around the house. “Nothing got into a fight with a guy at school.” He stated, raking his fingers through the curly black hair. The young boy next to him looked up to confused. That wasn’t what happened. “You should see the other guy.” The pre-teen then went on with a smirk.

 

Their father patted his shoulder and the younger boy’s head. Stumbling into the kitchen where the woman was. She looked at the man who kissed her cheek before kissing the top of the baby’s head and walking away.

 

He doesn’t remember his mother, and since he was about five, he has been a big brother to James. This woman had entered the family by claiming the child she was pregnant with was his father. The man was always drunk, high, or both. It was possible for the child to be his,  but the pre-teen wasn’t so sure. The younger boy looks too much like just the mother and only one or two things could have come from their father.

 

The little girl in the woman’s arms was a different story. The girl looked like a mix of the two. Her father’s eyes and dark hair was most clearly seen. The pale skin looked a little lighter than her mother's. Looking in direction of the mother and daughter, his eyes went to the little brown-eyed boy next to him. “Come on, Jimmy.” He motioned for the boy to follow him.

 

Out the back door. The two boys saw a boy about ten years old and his brother about Jimmy’s age unpacking their stuff. They were moving into the house across the street, behind theirs. The area they were in an opened area, very much country.

 

Jimmy bounced, his dark brown hair falling around his eyes. Waving at the pair across the street. When they waved back, that is when the elder of the siblings started to head that way. “Alex, where you going?” The five-year-old yelped, before bolting after his older brother.

 

Alex shrugged his shoulders. “Greeting the new neighbors.” He gave a big smile.

 

* * *

**YEAR** : 1976 

**AGE** : 2 Years Old

Alex flopped down on the couch. He didn’t want to watch his sister, but he was forced to. No choice. Jimmy is sleeping over at someone’s house and his loving stepmother wanted a day out of the house. Glaring at the window, he wanted to throw something through it. Punch a wall or a couple of faces.

 

That is when he heard crying. Getting up, he walked up the stairs. The toddler was screaming bloody murder, by the time he got to the room she was in, he stopped at seeing why she was. A man was standing there, inside of her room. “Bubba!” She screamed at seeing Alex standing in the doorway.

 

“Who are you?” The barely fourteen-year-old asked, glaring at the man. 

 

He scuffed. “You must be the eldest. I was told only to take the baby, but you might sweeten the pot.” He mumbled, the last part sounding like he was talking to himself rather than at Alex.

 

The man had a ski mask on and gloves. Before Alex could escape, something hit him on back of head close to his ear. It was hard enough that made everything go dizzy before he hit the ground. All he could hear was his little sister scream for him.

 

When he was awoken, he had a sick headache and felt sticky. The room humid and hard to breathe from the heat. “Bubba…-” Soft crying could be heard. He couldn’t bring himself to open his eyes, but shifting his shoulders, he could tell he was tied to a chair. His legs are too. Hands behind his back in a strange way that if he pulled his arms wrong, one or both would break. Even if he did pull trying to break free and break his arms, he'd still be stuck in the chair. “Bubba…-” The whimpering kept him from letting the darkness consume him. Slowly he opened his eyes, though the room seemed to spin slightly.

 

“Joey, Imma here.” He stated, tilting his head forward. Voice was slurred but at hearing his voice with a groan of pain the small child got quiet.

 

Eyes finally adjusted to the darkness. He could hardly see what looked like heads around him. Even a few small shapes that resembled babies or children. “Bubba…-” Another whimper for Joey which made him turn his head to where her voice was. She was in a small dog crate. The lock had a padlock on it instead of normal pull latch.

 

Moving some, he looked around the room. Everything was still a little blurry, and hard to see from the darkness. “Joey, Baby, what do you see around us?” He groaned, not sure where they were. Trying to figure a way they could escape. 

 

The little girl made a noise before spoke. “Dollies.” She answered, “Bubba… Where mama?” She whimpered.

 

Though when the door that was behind him at an angle he couldn’t see it opened, the little girl started to scream. Turning his head to see a man walking to the dog crate and started to pick it up. The little girl was screaming louder now. “Leave her alone!” He screamed at the man that was picking up the crate. “Hey! Dipshit! Leave my sis alone!” He screamed as loud as he could.

 

The man then dropped the crate which made the girl scream louder and crying could be heard. Walking forward to where Alex was, Alex was hit in the face. He could taste the copper in his mouth, blood. Spitting it out onto the man before him. “Ya feel big and bad? Have two defenseless kids trapped?” He growled out. Bright blue eyes looked into the darkness of the man before him.  The man then turns and walked away.

 

A ski mask was still on. They were planning on letting them leave alive. “Take the girl. She’s our payment. Leave the boy.” The man snapped orders. That made the teenager’s heart beat fast. Eyes going wide. Looking around at what looked to be eyes all around him.

 

Then taking a deep breath, bright blue eyes closed. Just as his baby sister, the one he was regretting babysitting, started to scream again. Screaming at him. “Wait! I can get you money! If that what ya want!” He screams. That made everything go quietly. Even his sister’s voice got lower, whimpering.

 

The room then went bright. “How?” The man asked, walking to the teenager. The brightness of the room was blinding, making him squint up at the man. When his eyes readjusted, he blinked a few times to help them adjust. When could see, he spotted ripped to shreds doll pieces and other things around him. He noticed a few mannequins that were either taken apart or not touch. They seemed to be facing him and his sister.

 

Scoffing, his eyes then looked to where the little girl was, holding her arm to her chest. The bastard must have caught her arm when they dropped the dog crate earlier. The teen glared up at the man that stood before him as another man placed the crate down.

 

"I know where my dad hides his money. It's in a vault and I can get into it. Please, let me and Joey go. She is a baby." He stated fear for his sister clear in his voice. He was pleading with them. "Please, I'll get it for you, let her go." 

 

"How much?" The man that seemed to be their leader asked, which made Alex hesitate for a moment.

 

Shaking his head, he wasn't sure. "I can't say for sure, but it should be a good bit since he has been placing money into it since I was little. Probably before that." Alex stated, trying to remember clearly. "He always called it retirement." Alex finally stated what he remember their father state when he was still sober more than drunk.

 

The men looked at each other, then to the boy. "How long did she said that the family will be out?" Alex could hear one of the men ask the other in a low voice. It was obvious Alex wasn't supposed to hear them.

 

"It would be for a few more hours. The boy woke up sooner than what we thought he would." The leader replied, and then their voices got lower.

 

Alex was confused about who she would be. How would whoever she is know how long no one but him and Joey would be home?

 

The men then turned to the boy. "We are going to have a gun to your sister, we expect you to be on your best behavior or bullet to the brainpan for her." The leader stated. "Get the ropes from the other room. When you get back we will cut him loose to have open the safe for us at the house."

 

The second man nodded his head. The teen look at the little girl who was still whimpering in the dog crate. "It's okay, Joey, I'm here. Joey, baby, look at me." That made her blue eyes connect with his own. "Hey, baby girl, I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere without you. We are going to do something for these men, then they will let us free." Alex kept talking, waiting for the men to cut him loose. Upon doing so, they tied his wrists up, then freed his legs.

 

Bag over his head, he wasn't sure what direction they were going. It was about two hours before they are pulling down a road that felt familiar to him. He doesn't know how the bumps and the jerks from the truck they are in felt familiar to him, but it did.

 

Stopping at his house, that was completely dark. That what he could see once they pull the cloth off of his face. "Backdoor. Through the kitchen. It is faster to get to the safe." He commented. They did as he said. Turning on the kitchen light, the backlight turned on too. He reached out with his elbow, flickering the porch like a few times before turning it off. Now he just hoped his friend for past two years noticed the signal.

 

Getting to the side door, to his dad's office. The pictures of men in uniforms, a few metals that were encased in picture frames. One picture, in particular, stood out from the others. It was their father when he was younger holding one of them in army uniform.

 

Getting to the safe he bent down, motioning to his binds behind his back. "Need my hands-free." He stated before the man untied the rope.

 

Turning to the safe, he started to put in the code as slow as he could. On purposely messing up. He was claiming he was having an issue with remembering the password. The men were losing their patience, time was running out.

 

The men didn't see the second boy that came in from the kitchen door. The second boy slipped through and ducked at seeing the two men. No mistaking the masks and spotted the gun that the second one was held to the little girl's head. When the little girl spotted him, the second boy, placed his finger to his lips in a 'keep silent' motion.

 

The girl watched as the dirty blonds moved closer to the man that was holding the small girl against her will. Sneaking up carefully, he grips the man's arm and pushed upward. The man pulled the trigger. At the gun going off, Alex's arm went back elbowing the man behind him in the groin.

 

The dirty blond kept on attacking the man before him. The thirteen-year-old got the man onto the ground, the gun slid away. The thirteen-year-old kept punching him in the face till the man stopped moving.

 

Alex had done much of the same thing. The two-year-old ran away to hide. 

 

Once the two men were down, they called the police. Men arrested, the boys were scolded for taking action in such a dangerous situation. It was a miracle that neither of them or the little girl was seriously hurt.

 

The small girl went running up to the boy with her arms up to him. "Her! Her!" she cheered.

 

He went down, picking the two-year-old up carefully. "Her?" One of the officers asked, raising an eyebrow at the young boy.

 

A blush dusted his cheeks. "My name is Herman, sir. She has issues with m sounds right now." Herman explained, scratching the back of his head. 

 

The man just nodded his head, finishing the reports.

* * *

 

**YEAR** : 1981

**AGE** : 7 

A girl looked up at the two older teenagers and one mid-teen. She not even ten yet, with dark brown hair that resembles black and sparkling blue eyes. The first boy that was making sicking sounds but nothing coming out of him had dark hair and eyes. Another mid-teen boy was frowning after them, but refusing to get involved. This one with dirty blond hair and green eyes that were glaring in direction of the group. “So what is on the schedule today?” The elder dirty blond asked, sunglasses blocking his eyes from everyone around him. The younger dirty blond scuffed, before walking away.

 

The other late teen, or young adult, that is about his age gave a big smile. His sparkling blue eyes looked down at the girl with the same eyes. “You up to some trouble, Phiney?” He asked, showing all his teeth with a wide grin.

 

The girl shrugged her shoulders, before looking at the mid-teen with dark hair. Eyes for a moment following the dirty blond mid-teen. “Is Jim going to be okay here, Alex?” She asked, before looking to the two eldest before her. The mid-teen was holding onto his side, refusing to move from the spot he was in. Breathing was shallow and still on occasions making sicking noises.

 

The two eldest knew what was wrong with him, assuming giving him time, he’d get over it. “He’ll be fine.” The blond insisted, moving his sunglasses down to wink at her. The blond then held his hand out to her. “Come on, Josie.” He spoke, giving her a crooked smile that he knew she couldn’t say no to.

 

Looking again at the dark-haired preteen on the ground, she took his hand and went with them. Her eyes kept looking back at the boy who wasn’t moving from his place but obviously still breathing. “He’ll be fine!” The teenage boy that looked like her declared, starting to get annoyed at her.

 

Moving forward, she tugged at the dirty blond's shirt tail. He chuckled, before going down, letting her crawl onto his back. "It sucks that you go to Lodi. We could have had so much fun at Charming High." Alex laughed.

 

The blond nodded his head in agreement. "What are we doing now?" He wonders.

 

"Oh, Herms, we are going to have the fun of course." Alex gave him a grin that would scare most people.

 

The more his stepmother pushes him, the more Alex tries to rebel against her. He'd do anything and everything no matter how stupid the thing is. Only happy if it pisses her off.

 

Though a lot of the shit he does, even his best friend finds disturbing. The latest thing they roped their younger brothers into helping. Herman's younger brother, Jeffery, had opted out after helping them break in. Jimmy, on the other hand, had stayed with them until the end. Now dealing with the disturbing images in his head. Dealing with what he had done.

 

Shaking his head, the man walked after Alex. He would prevent things from disturbing Josephine. Even at the funeral home, he made Josephine stay with Jeffery as lookouts. She is completely clueless about what her big brothers have done. Herman staying out of it for the most part. He was in it for the adrenaline rush. The risk of getting caught.

 

Getting into his dad's truck, Herman put Josephine into the middle spot. Then started to truck to wait to find out where they are going. "We are heading to my grandparent's farm." That made Herman shoot him a look. The two others can walk home, no issue, but that farm is a little far out. "Don't worry. Ain't anyone been out there in years..." he froze a moment to think. "besides me and Phiney here," Alex stated with that troublesome smirk.

 

Getting to the secluded barn, Herman parked the truck and the other man gave him a bigger smile. "Ready for this, brother?"

 

"I'm not even sure what we are doing," Herman stated.

 

The boy rolled his eyes before motioning him to follow. "Bring the video camera too!" Alex called, running to the barn.

 

Herman reached to the back of the truck. He had saved up working summers helping out anywhere he could to pay for gas for the truck and buy the video camera. Going after his friend, the seven-year-old speed walks alongside. "You have any idea what going on?" Herman asked, looking down at her.

 

The little girl shrugged her shoulders. "No idea." She admitted, with a soft laugh.

 

Shaking his head, Herman strapped the case to his back and started to climb the ladder that was left out. The seven-year-old followed him up. He moved to the side, allowing the small girl up between him and the ladder. He carefully walked with her going up to the roof of the old barn.

 

She made a noise, looking down. Herman gave her a soft push to move forward. She got onto the more steady area, he picked her up and carried her to where the roof goes flat. Under them is where the hay used to be thrown out to the horses. Way back when the Trager family owned horses.

 

He placed her down farthest away from the edge before setting up the camera. "Hold this, stay here where you are safe." He commented, before turning it on. Once he was sure it was recording, he placed a soft kiss on top of her head. Then turned to his best friend. "Okay, Alex, what are we doing up here?"

 

"Camera on?"

 

"Yes?"

 

"Good." He grabbed a rope that was tied to a rafter that stuck out from under them. "I'm going to bungee jump. I want video evidence!" Wrapping it around his waist, he was knotting it.

That made Herman gave the man a confused look. "The rope isn't bouncy like the ones at the store in Lodi!" Joey called from her safe place away from them. "It won't be same! You might get hurt!"

 

The eighteen-year-old Alex gave her that troublesome smile. Then jumped. "You can't fix stupid, darlin'." Herman declared watching his best friend go over the edge.

 

Herman looked over the edge. The rope tightens about ten feet from the ground. Making Alex scream in pain before the rope snapped and he fell the last of it.

 

The little girl jumped up with the camera. She was running to Herman to check on her big brother. Instead, she got caught by the dirty blond and carried to the ladder. "You are going down first." The little girl kept shaking her head and noise of protest left her lips. One of fear.

 

He sighed. Starting down a few steps then waited. "Like how we got up here." He commented. She nodded her head. She was fine with that. Knowing the late teenager would never allow anything to happen to her.

 

Once on the ground, they rushed to where Alex was. Herman was helping him up, Joey still recording. Alex was laughing then coughing and groaning in pain every time he did. "You are an idiot." Herman declared.

 

The older just laughed, Herman was getting him to the truck. They had to take him to the hospital. "What are we going to tell them happened?" Herman wondered, upon getting the camera shut off.

 

"That he's an idiot and nothin' can fix stupid?" Joey suggested. "Though we can put duct tape on him. It can't fix stupid but it can silence it for a while."

 

Herman laughed, he liked that one. "I knew there was a reason I liked you."


	2. Chapter 2

 

**Anyplace is better**

**Starting from zero got nothing to lose**

**Maybe we'll make something**

**Me, myself I got nothing to prove**

**YEAR** : 1981

**AGE** : 7 Years Old

* * *

 

A girl looked up at the two older teenagers and two mid-teens. She not even ten yet, with dark brown hair that resembles black and sparkling blue eyes. The first boy that was making sicking sounds but nothing coming out of him had dark hair and eyes. Another mid-teen boy was frowning after them, but refusing to get involved. This one with dirty blond hair and green eyes that were glaring in direction of the group. “So what is on the schedule today?” The elder dirty blond asked, sunglasses blocking his eyes from everyone around him. The younger dirty blond scuffed, before walking away.

 

The other late teen, or young adult, that is about his age gave a big smile. His sparkling blue eyes looked down at the girl with the same eyes. “You up to some trouble, Phiney?” He asked, showing all his teeth with a wide grin.

 

The girl shrugged her shoulders, before looking at the mid-teens with dark hair. Eyes for a moment following the dirty blond mid-teen. “Is Jimmy going to be okay here, Alex?” She asked, before looking at the two eldest before her. The mid-teen was holding onto his side, refusing to move from the spot he was in. Breathing was shallow and still on occasions making sicking noises.

 

The two eldest knew what was wrong with him, assuming giving him time, he’d get over it. “He’ll be fine.” The blond insisted, moving his sunglasses down to wink at her. The blond then held his hand out to her. “Come on, Josie.” He spoke, giving her a crooked smile that he knew she wouldn’t say no to.

 

Looking again at the dark-haired preteen on the ground, she took his hand and went with them. Her eyes kept looking back at the boy who wasn’t moving from his place but obviously still breathing. “He’ll be fine!” The teenage boy that looked like her declared, starting to get annoyed at her.

 

Moving forward, she tugged at the dirty blond's shirt tail. He chuckled, before going down, letting her crawl onto his back. "It sucks that you go to Lodi. We could have had so much fun at Charming High." Alex laughed.

 

The blond nodded his head in agreement. "What are we doing now?" He wonders.

 

"Oh, Herms, we are going to have the fun of course." Alex gave him a grin that would scare most people.

 

The warm breeze of the end of summer blew across them, her body tucked into Herman’s back. She was starting to get tired, they have been up since early morning. Jumping from place to place, doing things on Alex’s bucket list before everyone goes back to school and he has to get another job.

 

The more his stepmother pushes him, the more Alex tries to rebel against her. He'd do anything and everything no matter how stupid the thing is. Only happy if it pisses her off.

 

Though a lot of the shit he does, even his best friend finds disturbing. The latest thing they roped their younger brothers into helping. Herman's younger brother, Jeffery, had opted out after helping them break in. Jimmy, on the other hand, had stayed with them until the end. Now dealing with the disturbing images in his head. Dealing with what he had done.

 

Shaking his head, the man walked after Alex. He would prevent things from disturbing Josephine. Even at the funeral home, he made Josephine stay with Jeffery as lookouts. She is completely clueless about what her big brothers have done. Herman staying out of it for the most part. He was in it for the adrenaline rush. The risk of getting caught.

 

Getting into his dad's truck, Herman put Josephine into the middle spot. Then started to truck to wait to find out where they are going. "We are heading to my grandparent's farm." That made Herman shoot him a look. The two others can walk home, no issue, but that farm is a little far out. "Don't worry. Ain't anyone been out there in years..." he froze a moment to think. "besides me and Phiney here," Alex stated with that troublesome smirk.

 

Getting to the secluded barn, Herman parked the truck and the other man gave him a bigger smile. "Ready for this, brother?"

 

An annoyed sigh left the younger teen. "I'm not even sure what we are doing," Herman stated.

 

The boy rolled his eyes before motioning him to follow. "Bring the video camera too!" Alex called, running to the barn.

 

Herman reached to the back of the truck. He had saved up working summers helping out anywhere he could to pay for gas for the truck and buy the video camera. Going after his friend, the seven-year-old speed walks alongside. "You have any idea what going on?" Herman asked, looking down at her.

 

The little girl shrugged her shoulders. "No idea." She admitted, with a small yawn.

 

Shaking his head, Herman strapped the case to his back and started to climb the ladder that was left out. The seven-year-old followed him up. He moved to the side, allowing the small girl up between him and the ladder. He carefully walked with her going up to the roof of the old barn.

 

She made a noise, looking down. Herman gave her a soft push to move forward. She got onto the more steady area, he picked her up and carried her to where the roof goes flat. Under them is where the hay used to be thrown out to the horses. Way back when the Trager family owned horses.

 

He placed her down farthest away from the edge before setting up the camera. "Hold this, stay here where you are safe." He commanded, before turning it on. Once he was sure it was recording, he placed a soft kiss on top of her head. Then turned to his best friend. "Okay, Alex, what are we doing up here?"

 

"Camera on?" Alex asked, spinning around with a big smile that would probably disturb many people. This is why the only job he has been able to get is a mechanic in town. Most people thought he was crazy and avoided him.

 

Herman hesitated, before looking back to check on Josephine. "Yes?" He answered, unsure what is going to happen next. He was trying to figure out if he should take Josephine elsewhere or not. Most of today Alex had informed Herman what was going to happen so Herman knew what to have Josephine to do to not be disturbed.

 

Nodding his head, Alex looked really happy about that answered. "Good." He grabbed a rope that was tied to a rafter that stuck out from under them. "I'm going to bungee jump. I want video evidence!" Wrapping it around his waist, he was knotting it.

 

That made Herman gave the man a confused look. "The rope isn't bouncy like the ones at the store in Lodi!" Joey called from her safe place away from them. "It won't be same! You might get hurt!"

 

The nineteen-year-old Alex gave her that troublesome smile. Then jumped. "You can't fix stupid, darlin'." Herman declared watching his best friend go over the edge.

 

Herman looked over the edge. The rope tightens about ten feet from the ground. Making Alex scream in pain before the rope snapped and he fell the last of it.

 

The sound of Alex’s scream made Herman flinch back. It sounded painful, he had to admit. The little girl jumped up with the camera.

 

Josephine was running to Herman to check on her big brother. Instead, she got caught by the dirty blond and carried to the ladder. "You are going down first." The little girl kept shaking her head and noise of protest left her lips. One of fear.

 

He sighed. Starting down a few steps then waited. "Like how we got up here." He commented. She nodded her head. She was fine with that. Knowing the late teenager would never allow anything to happen to her.

 

Once on the ground, they rushed to where Alex was. Herman was helping him up, Joey still recording. Alex was laughing then coughing and groaning in pain every time he did. "You are an idiot." Herman declared.

 

The older just laughed, Herman was getting him to the truck. They had to take him to the hospital. "What are we going to tell them happened?" Herman wondered, upon getting the camera shut off.

 

"That he's an idiot and nothin' can fix stupid?" Joey suggested. "Though we can put duct tape on him. It can't fix stupid but it can silence it for a while."

 

Herman laughed, he liked that one. "I knew there was a reason I liked you." He commented, before cutting the rope off of Alex. “Go opened the back of the truck for me.” He motioned to the bed of the white truck.

 

Running forward, Josephine placed the still active camera on the edge of the truck and started to lower the tailgate. Turning her head, she could see Herman come to them with a very much in pain Alex. Placing him in the back of the truck, Josephine tried to climb in too. “No, ya don’t.” Herman pulled her to the edge and picked her up easily. “You are sitting in the truck with me. Idiots only in the back.” He added, which made a pout cross her lips. He wasn’t going to budge and all of them knew it.

* * *

 

**YEAR** : 1985

**AGE** :11 Years Old

Herman laughed as his friend was hitting on the girl behind the register. The almost preteen next to him had just rolled her eyes so many times. Herman has joked, he is surprised her eyes haven't rolled out of her head yet. "Neither of you takes a hint," Josephine stated, leaning against his side.

 

He wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "Oh? Wait till you are older and start noticing guys like how we notice girls." He stated. "C'mon darlin', I'll buy you a candy bar." He motioned to the register that was still free.

 

Rolling her eyes for what felt like the thousandth time, Joey looked up to him. "But there is a guy I like. I don't harass him like you two harass the pretty ladies you are always around." She stated, with a huff.

 

That made the man raise an eyebrow at her. "You like-like someone?" He asked, with a frown tugging at his lips for a fleeting moment. Instead of showing how he disapproves of her already liking boys, he gave her a fake smile, ready to start teasing her.

 

The girl looked up at him like he had grown a second head. "Yeah, he's pretty cool. Kinda nice to me." She stated, moving forward to grab the candy bar she wanted.

 

He paid for it while thinking about what she said. "If that is the case, mind if I meet him?" He wondered. Smirking down at her, giving her a couple pokes in the side.

 

That made the girl stiffen up for a moment, then wiggled to get away from his poking fingers. "No!" She yelped, voice going squeaky. That confused him. "You'd probably scare him for fun." She added quickly eyes darting around. He then noticed her face was turning a light shade of red.

 

"Are you blushing, Josie?" He asked, poking her cheek. That made her face heat up more. "That is so cute.~" He cooed, to her annoyance.

 

Instead of talking to him, she punches his arm and crossed her arms in a huff. The cashier laughed, as did her big brother who was watching the exchange between the two. "You are taking your sister to dance class? That is so sweet." The cashier that had check Joey and Herman out cooed at Alex.

 

The one he has been hitting on still showed no interest.  "If I want to get there on time, we should go now!" Joey called after Alex.

 

He rolled his eyes and sent her a playful glare. "Yeah, she's right. See you, ladies, later?" He blew them a kiss, before following after Herman and the almost pre-teen.

 

Alex did notice that Joey would randomly look to where Herman was. Whenever he was flirting with a girl, Joey always runs up to him and hold his arm or leg. His attention would go from the girl he's flirting with or impressing to Joey, every time.

 

Slowly Alex was piecing together what was obvious to the girls that Herman have chased after. Herman has been oblivious to. It was a little amusing to Alex.

 

At the dance studio, Herman walked in with them. She had to run into the back. Both of them waited, talking to the instructor. Alex had to sign her in, but Herman actually liked the instructor.

 

Upon getting back, changed into a plane leotard. Rushing forward, Herman spotted her before the instructor. "I have to go, Josie." He commented.

 

A soft whine left Joey, but her arms went around his neck. He picked her up letting her legs wrap around his middle as he held her up. Hugging her back. "Be safe?" She pleads, in a soft voice.

 

The man laughed softly. "Yeah." He promised before placing a kiss on her cheek. "I will, darlin'." The girl giggled and excitedly unwrapped herself from the dirty blond. Upon feet touching the ground, she rushed to her big brother. Alex only gave her an one arm hug.

 

Rushing to the rest of the class, the instructor handed a piece of paper to Herman who gave her a warm smile. “I’ll see you later,” Herman told the instructor who gave him a giggle.

 

Alex rolled his eyes. “Blondy, ya an idiot.” Was all he could say.

 

Frowning, Herman looked at his best friend with a raised eyebrow. “How so? She’s cute and gave me her number.” He held up the piece of paper to show Alex. “She gets off of work around seven, which means I can pick her up then.” he gave a bigger smile.

 

Alex shook his head, small frown on his lips. “But she’s Phiney’s dance instructor. If you upset her, she’d take it out on Phiney. This is one of the few things that her ma is making her do that she likes.” Alex growled.

 

Herman rolled his eyes, walking to his truck. The money he was saving up was to buy a certain car. One that he knew that Josephine would love, and make sure he drives her everywhere. That made him smiled at the thought. The girl was probably his second best friend, behind her big brother being the first best friend.

 

Getting his truck started, he left Alex to walk to his bike that Josephine is scared of. That is actually why Herman has been in Charming more than what he originally planned for. Alex refuses to drive a car, leaving her with only option to get Jimmy to drive her or go across the street and ask one of the Kozik brothers to drive her. Herman normally stays at home at night, but leaves during the early morning. He always backs by the time it is getting late.

 

Charlotte has no idea where he has been, or what his job is. Only details she knows is it’s running errands for an elderly man in Lodi. As far as the woman knows, he works for a man who grows different plants and sells them. The man can’t get around himself, so Herman transports them for the elderly man.

 

Not able to break his mom’s heart, Herman just keeps that lie up. Sometimes he does go to the flower shop to buy a few plants that look ready to die and give them to his mom to take care of. Telling her they were the ones that nothing the man could do could save them.

 

The woman always loved a challenge and saving those plants was the perfect ones. Also fed her with the lies easier. Not full lies. He could never tell a flat out lie to her. Only bending the truth enough she doesn’t know what he’s really doing.

 

Driving into the meeting place in Lodi, he jumped on the hood of his truck and waited for the man to show up. Within twenty minutes, his supplier did. “Took you long enough, Kozik.” The dark skin man stated, walking forward and handing over a bag to him. “You know the drill.”

 

“Yeah, yeah. Sell and I get my cut, ya get the rest.” He stated, before putting the bag in the back of his truck. Then they loaded the plants that were being used to harbor the real money makers over to the back of Herman’s truck. When done, Herman wiped the dirt off on his pants before tilting his head at them.

 

“Wait, Kozik.” The man stopped him. “Boss said he wanted to add a new choice to the mix. I figure as the middleman, ya should know about it.” Herman just nodded his head, before getting into the truck.


	3. Chapter 3

 

**You got a fast car**

**I got a plan to get us out of here**

**I have been working at the convenience store**

**Managed to save just a little bit of money**

**Won't have to drive too far**

**Just 'cross the border and into the city**

**You and I can both get jobs**

**And finally, see what it means to be living**

**YEAR:**  1987

**AGE** :13 Years Old

* * *

 

Seeing the blue Chevelle outside of the Kozik residence, Josephine knew he was home. The woman about his age running out the back looked wide-eyed at her before bolting down the street. That made her confuse.

 

Warm sun on her skin, with a soft breeze. It was a beautiful day, but no reason to be scared. Nothing ever happens out this way, since the people kidnapped her when she was little. Though people have claimed that they heard guns going off a lot.

 

Alex and her dad had taught her how to use the family’s guns. Their targets are every single doll that her mother has ever bought her. She has gotten good, fear drove her from not missing.

 

Alex freezes up at seeing dolls, which is something she needs to not happen to her in an emergency. Instead, she makes fear make her reach for a gun instead of freeze up. Which Herman supported. He even got old dolls to use as target practice for her before.

 

Getting around the house, she saw the small shed that Herman had set up for his tools and such for his car. He even has a place to park it should we in California ever get rain. That makes her scuffed under her breath. It happens but not very often.

 

“Herms?” She called, getting to the door. It was jammed. “Herman?” She called again looking around confused. “Herman, what was the woman running away from?” She called, trying to get him to stick his head out. “Did you ask her to dance? I told you, you aren’t good at dancing!” She was taunting him now. Normally that gets him to come out of his hiding places when trying to scare her. “Herman?” She called again, worry starting to etch in her voice.

 

She heard a noise come from the small shed that she couldn’t get opened. Then thumping noise. Looking into the window, she saw him on the floor, blocking the door. The window was opened enough that someone could climb through.

 

Running inside, she grabbed the phone in the kitchen and dialed the only number she could think of. “Teller-Morrow Auto Repair.” A masculine voice she didn’t know answered the phone.

 

Taking a gulp of air, she tried to calm her racing heart. “Hi, this is Josephine Trager, can you tell Alex that he needs to come home now, it’s an emergency?” she asked, trying to figure out what to do. She didn’t know how to drive yet, and there is no way an ambulance could get down their dirt road. The only way out is if someone drives him to town.

 

The phone went silent on the other end, then Alex was on the phone with her. “Phiney, what’s wrong?” He asked, confusion in his voice.

 

“I’m at the Kozik house and Herman is in the shed laying on the floor spazzing and I think he was unconscious.” She spoke so fast, it took Alex a moment to figure out what she was saying.

 

She could hear him pull the phone away from him and start talking to someone else. “Fuck, dollface, get in there and try to make sure he doesn’t hurt himself. I will be there soon.” He commanded. With that, she heard a click. Grabbing a cup and water, she rushed outside. Carefully she balanced herself with the cup of water into the window and crawled over to where Herman is.

 

Placing the cup on the table that had a mess of car parts and dirty rags, she placed her arms under his, trying to ignore the jerking of his body. She dragged him as far away from the door as she could. His hot skin was making her uncomfortable. Fear rushing through her body. Seeing that a needle wasn’t far from her. Multiple of them which made her panic.

 

She wasn’t naive, she knew that needles if not for medical reasons were used for drugs. One thing she never expected was that Herman Kozik would ever use drugs. She didn’t think he even liked them, by how he protectively get between her and the druggies at the high school. When he has dropped her off a few times.

 

Placing her forehead on his, she tried to calm down. “Herms, listen to me please.” She begged, not knowing if he would hear her. “If anything happens to you, I don’t know how I’ll live without you. You are my best friend, please.” She begged tears in her eyes. “I need you, Herman.” She softly sobbed.

 

“Josephine?!” Alex’s voice echoed rushing into. The door flung opened to his bright blue eyes landing on the young man head resting on her lap. His body was still jerking, but she ignored it. Taking a deep breath, Alex looked at Josephine’s tear-streaked face. “We need to get him into his car. Ya can’t come. I’ll drop him off.” Alex demanded.

 

Shaking her head, she started to protest. “No, I have to go... -” Alex’s glare made her bite her tongue.

 

“The police will be called in. I ain’t letting ‘em touch ya. Ya are staying here clean up so Charlotte doesn’t see any of this. Be careful about the needles.” He motions to them. Picking up one of the ones that weren't used, he placed it in a bag where it wouldn’t be touching him.

 

Picking up Herman, he slung the man over his shoulders. Josephine helped Alex get the blond out of the shed, then ran around them to Herman’s car. Opening the car, she ran to the driver side, searching until she found the keys to start it up. Alex place Herman in the passenger seat, and then closed the door.

 

Reaching out, Alex places a kiss on Josephine’s cheek. “I love ya, baby girl.”

 

“Love you both.” She told him, hugging him as he got into the car. “He is going to be okay right, Bubba?” She asked, slipping into her old nickname for him.

 

The man gave her a crooked but forced smile. “Of course. Kozik is a tough fucker.” He commented.

 

Going back to the shed, she dumped the water over the vomit she noticed, then grabbed one of the dirty rags. Trying her best to get it off of the ground. Tossing the rag into the wash bin. She started to carefully pick up the needles and placing them into a beer bottle he had left in the shed while working on one of the car pieces. When it got full, she went inside and grabbed more from the trashcan, putting more needles in the empty ones from inside.

 

Sweeping, reorganizing, and cleaning in general. She was searching for anything else to toss. She found some more of the unused needles, placing them to the side. The whole bag would have to be tossed. She threw the others in the bottles into a trash bag. Once finally finished, she placed them outside of the shed.

 

When nightfall came around, Alex came back with Herman’s car, he helped Josephine load the back of the truck up with the trash bags from the shed. Showing him the unused needles, Alex cursed. Josephine demanded answers but Alex shook his head. “I knew he was selling weed, I didn’t know he was selling Heroin,” Alex commented. “He must have started using because of the ones who were giving to him to sell. A way to make sure he doesn’t turn around and give it to the police.” Alex mumbled mostly to himself.

 

Josephine shook her head in disbelief. “But he would never. Would he really?” Josephine asked, tears forming in her eyes again.

 

Alex let out an annoyed huffed. “I’m sorry, dollface, but sometimes people do stupid shit.” He commented, tossing everything into the dumpsters. They were public dumpsters between Lodi and Charming. Not even usual dumpsters that Alex dropped off their trash too. It was farther out than that.

 

After a few minutes, he watched the girl in silence, their ride back to their home. “Listen, baby, I am thinking tomorrow ya come to work with me. Afterward, we can visit Herms in the hospital.” Alex suggested.

 

She was looking out the window, in her own little world. She had a solid way of thinking, but her world was starting to crumble apart. Herman Kozik and Alexander Trager were the two strongest people in her eyes. She has found Herman passed out on the ground body twitching and spazzing around. He was burning up and vomit on the ground that had to be his.

 

Tears started to form in her eyes. Alex was angry and she couldn’t figure out how she didn’t know any of this that Alex had admitted to. Herman selling weed? How did she not know? She thought he sold plants in Lodi!

 

“There ain't nothing ya could have done,” Alex commented, before parking the truck on side of the street. Tears still falling down her face. “Baby, listen to me.” He made her face him. “Herman did this to himself. Nothing ya could have done would have made this not happen. It ain’t ya fault.” He stated clearly. “Ya head telling ya to figure out how ya didn’t know, ya didn’t because he didn’t want ya to.”

 

Tears running down her face, Alex wiped them with the rough pads of his thumbs. She moved forward, till his warm arms were wrapped around her tightly. “Is there anything else I don’t know?” She wondered, tucking herself into her brother, still crying.

 

A hum left Alex before he spoke into her hair. “A lot, but nothing that needs to be talked about right now.” He commented, before placing a kiss on top of her head. “Let's go home, get us clean and food.” He put the car back in drive and pulled into the street from the side of the road.

 

A week pass, Josephine laid her head resting on the bed next to Herman’s hand. She wasn’t expecting someone to run their fingers through them. Opening her eyes, she looked up to him, and he gave her a crooked smile. “Alex said it cause of ya I am still alive.” He commented, slowly pushing himself up.

 

Getting up, she crawled into the bed with him. “Don’t say that too loudly. Anyone asks, Alex found ya.” Josephine commented, wrapping her arms around him and he placed his arms on her shoulders holding her close to him.

 

Face burying into her hair, he relaxed at feeling her so close to him. “I’m sorry for worrying ya, Josie.” He stated, placing a kiss on top of her head. Tears started to form in her eyes, “What is ya crying for?” He asked, wiping them away as they escaped. “Josie?”

 

“I was so scared, Herman. I thought I was going to lose my best friend. I didn’t know you were selling drugs, much less using them. Finding out like that scared me so  badly.” She cried, clinging to the hospital gown he wore. He just held her to him tightly. Still weak from it all. The hospital wanted to hold him longer since he did go into a slight coma. Only woke up a couple days ago. Since then he rests most of the day and only awakes a little at a time. All his energy seemed to be drained.

 

“I’m not going anywhere.” He told her, placing a kiss on her cheek, catching one of her tears by accident. “I am going to rehab. I ain’t leavin’ ya or Alex. I’m not going to keep doing drugs.” He tucked his face into her neck, her arms tightening around him and soft sobs left her. He just held the young girl in his arms.

 

The woman in the doorway watched, neither of them knew that someone heard everything that they said. Her dirty blonde hair was turning gray and dark blue eyes were watching into the room with calculating eyes. Almost like she knew more was happening than what was present.

* * *

 

**YEAR** : 1988

**AGE** : 14 Years Old

Sitting at the hospital, she didn’t expect Herman to show up. When he walked in with another man, her heart seemed to skyrocket. Rushing forward, she tossed her arms around his neck. He held her close to him as the other man talked to the Trager family that was there.

 

“That’s my sponsor.” Herman motion to the man. “He is a Marine.” He explained, which the man turned to Josephine with a smile.

 

Hand going out to her, she hesitated before taking it. “I’m Hank Shepard. You must be Josie I have heard about. You look younger than what I expected.” The man raised an eyebrow to Herman who looked confused about what the man meant.

 

“Yeah, she acts older than she really is.” He commented. “I can’t believe I missed Alex’s wedding.” He randomly stated, pulling the tired Josephine into his lap.

 

Tucking herself in, she started to doze off, a hum left her in a sleepy tone. She is excited at seeing him, but she also been awake since Alex’s wife, Colleen, went into labor almost twelve hours before. She barely got any sleep past few nights because Colleen has been having Josephine waiting on her hand and feet. Alex told the woman multiple times if she needed anything to go to him. Leave Josephine alone.

 

Herman just let the mid-teenager sleep in his lap. Hank watched with a strange look before turning to the man that was talking to his son. “Can someone explain to me their relationship?” Hank asked, stepping to the two other men. “From way Kozik have talked about her in the past, it almost sounded like a lover. Her age makes me think I might have guessed wrong.” Hank explained, eyes going back to where Herman was holding the teen to his chest.

 

He was showing her respect, but also allowing her to sleep on him. It was a strange sight. They did look like lovers in his eyes, but at the same time, they also looked like an older brother and little sister relationship. It was confusing to the elder man.

 

“They are complicated,” Jimmy stated, looking to where his sister is. “Herman will never do anything to hurt her, and their relationship though is deep is pretty harmless most of the time. So we allow it to be.” Jimmy was the smart sibling. Joey the resourceful one, and then Alex the fearless one. If go with what Jimmy and Herman say, the stupid one. Josephine is the only one who sees him as fearless, in most situations.

 

Tucking herself into him more, she breathed in his scent and body was completely relaxed. Herman enjoys feeling her so close to him again. Last time he got to hold her while she slept was the day that he left the hospital for the rehab place that he was moving into for the next nine months. Since then, he got a place in Lodi with a legit job. He was working for the rehab place he was sent to. It was an off branch of the one in one of the bigger cities.

 

Whenever the doors down the hall opened, they saw Alex coming out and smile plastered on his face. Softly Herman woke up Josephine, who rubbed her eyes and blinked them clear till she noticed her eldest brother. “We got a baby girl!” He cheered. Which made everyone cheer.

 

Getting off of Herman’s lap, Alex swoops her up in his arms and swing her around in the air. “Not a rag doll!” She squealed, which made Herman laugh.

 

Placing the girl down, Alex narrowed his eyes at Herman but held his hand out to the man. They pulled each other to their chests and wrapped an arm around them patting each other between the shoulders. “Congratulation, brother,” Herman stated, with a warm smile.

 

Alex nodded his head, before motioning to his father and sister to go ahead. “Pa go hold ya granddaughter. Go with him, Phiney.” Alex places a kiss on top of Joey’s head and gave her a soft shove to the direction he came from. “They should have her back in the room now.”

 

Turning to face Herman, Alex raised an eyebrow at his friend. “So what are you doing here?” He asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

 

Jimmy is shocked. Alex just greeted him like he always has, now he was treating Herman coldly. Though thinking about it Jimmy piece together what was going on in Alex’s head. “He’s clean now,” Jimmy stated. “We have been keeping an eye on him, remember?”

 

Shaking his head, Alex didn’t want to hear it. “He might be my best friend, but I don’t want him near Phiney anymore,” Alex stated, eyes going to Jimmy. “Bad influence.”

 

Jimmy rolled his eyes. “YA is the worst influence on her than I could ever be.” Herman defended himself. “Though I do know where ya are coming from,” Herman admitted, ashamed of his past actions. “I’m here to talk to you, we are.” He motioned to the man next to him. Hank.

 

While Alex and Herman were talking, Jimmy and Hank being the referee so no fist fights were going to break out. They got to the hospital room that Colleen was in, to see Josephine was sitting in a chair and a baby asleep in her arms. Colleen was also asleep, but Alex ignored her walking to his baby sister. Placing his hands on her knees, he kneeled down in front of her.

 

“She’s so beautiful.” Joey breathed out, Alex nodded his head in agreement. “I can’t believe I am an aunt.” She added with a soft laugh.

 

He laughed too. “I know how ya feel. I’m a dad.” He shuddered and gave her a lopsided smile.

 

“You would be a great dad. You are the one who basically raised me.” She added, pressing a hand to his cheek puffing out her cheeks.

 

He laughed, looking down at the baby in her arms. “Yeah, I guess I did.” Herman stayed in the doorway. After Alex took the baby out of her arms, she went to him. He gave her a hug and told her he’d be back in Charming soon. He was getting a job there and he’d be around more often.

 

Placing a kiss on his cheek, she wrapped up in his arms. She felt safe and the warmth of him was welcoming to her. It was another thing she missed the most. His hugs were like a safety blanket to her.

 

After he was gone, Alex handed his daughter to Jimmy before heading out the door and pulled Joey after him. “Ya need to break ya crush on him,” Alex stated, flopping down in a chair across from her. “It ain’t good. Start dating boys at ya school.” Alex commanded. The look that Joey gave him seemed to make him rub his eyes. “I have known for years ya have a crush on Herman, but ya need to move on. He’s too old for ya.” He commented. “I don’t want ya chasing after my best friend.” He added.

 

The look that crossed Joey’s face almost made Alex take it all back. The pain that Joey was feeling was the almost triple amount of joy she felt not even a few minutes ago. Getting ready to argue, Alex held his hand up. He didn’t want to hear it. So she snapped her jaw shut, looking away from him to the hospital room where their father was looking at them from inside. 


	4. Chapter 4

(Eva Green in The Dreamers of Isabelle) 

 

 

**You see my old man's got a problem  
He lives with the bottle that's the way it is  
He says his body's too old for working  
His body's too young to look like his  
My mama went off and left him  
She wanted more from life than he could give  
I said somebody's got to take care of him  
So I quit school and that's what I did**

 

* * *

 

 **YEAR:** 1989

 **AGE** : 15 Years Old

 

Sitting on the couch, Josephine was dolled up and ready to go. Twiddling her fingers, she only accepted this date because her brothers keep pushing her to get over her long term crush on Herman. To her displeasure, she decided to try. It isn't like he's starting to notice her now as anything more than the baby sister of his best friend. 

 

Shifting in her place, she was starting to get antsy. She hated sitting still for a long time and the boy that was supposed to pick her up was already thirty minutes late. That made her twitch in her seat, wanting to go back upstairs and undo everything she set up. 

 

Slowly, falling asleep watching the time tick by. He was supposed to be there at five and it was well after midnight when she finally fell completely asleep. She awoken before the sun came up but hearing staggering and thumping in the room she was in. With a jolt up, she looked to the two who came in. "Herman, Alex, what are you two doing?" She yawned before the smell in the air hit her. They were out drinking. "God, I knew you two went to a party but did you have to get so wasted?" She coughs out, before glaring at the two. 

 

The men giggled like school girls. Alex flopping next to her, arm slung over her shoulders. "Ya know, baby, that I think ya old enough for  _the talk._ " He stated. 

 

Face paling, Josephine slipped out of his grasp shaking her head. "Nope, I took a health class that mom signed me up for. They explained perfectly about the birds, bees and all that shit." She shook her head and looked to where Herman was sitting laughing softly. "I think you two need to sleep this off." She finally decided, with a sigh. 

 

Getting Alex set up on the couch, she got him a bucket and turned him sideways so he doesn't drown in his own vomit. Looking to where Herman was watching her from, walking over to him, she sat down in his lap carefully. His big warm arms wrapped around her middle and chin rest on her shoulder. "Why are ya all pretty up? I mean ya normally pretty but damn ya about near give me a boner." He stated with a grin when she rolled her eyes at his comment. 

 

A soft sigh, she didn't see the point in lying to the man. "I was supposed to be going to a dance tonight. The guy never showed up." She admitted, leaning against his chest, face tuck into his neck. 

 

That made the man frown. "Ugh, teenagers are annoying," he grunted, hand rubbing her hair down carefully. She tried to ignore the alcohol and just enjoy being held by him. She knew why they went out partying, soon he and her brother were to be ship to training camp. Both of them joined the Marines. 

 

Feeling his hand push her neck in a way to make her look up at him, his warm lips ghost over her own. A silent panic escapes her as she could feel his teeth softly graze her bottom lip. Opening her mouth to tell him that they shouldn't do this, he slipped his tongue into her mouth.   
  
The nasty taste of cigarettes and alcohol was the first thing she notices. The next was how soft he was being at leading her tongue into his mouth. His hands were just as soft, rubbing her hips to have her turn to straddle his lap. 

 

Pulling away for air, she couldn't stop her eyes meeting his own. "What are you doing?" Josephine wondered, but the man just smirked before pulling her waist down. 

 

She could feel he wasn't kidding about her outfit making him get a boner. It caused a blush to spread across her face and body seem to heat up. The dress she wearing hiked up to her upper tights. "I'm not going to be here much longer so I want to do this before I leave." He commented, kissing her again this time she let herself melt into the kiss. 

 

This was wrong, she knew it was, but she couldn't stop herself from enjoying his touch. Never in a million years had Josephine thought that Herman would be her first kiss. His warm hands went up her thigh to feel the soft panties she had on. He didn't invade her more than to feel her soft skin under his callous hands. 

 

Glancing over to her brother who was still asleep on the couch, she allowed her to have this pleasure. She was sure that Herman wouldn't remember it, which also made her feel gross. She was using him while he was drunk and not in the right mind. 

 

When finally able to pull away, he kissed her neck and slowly lead his mouth to her shoulder bone start to nibble and suck which made a gasp leave her lips. She didn't expect it to feel that good. Rubbing her upper thighs, he pulled her closer, finishing off with her shoulder. "There, now you are mine." He commented, kissing her neck and looking up at her under his floppy hair. It was all going to be cut off soon, so she enjoys it while he had it. Running her fingers through his hair to make him look into her eyes. 

 

With a sigh, not liking the thought of leaving him but feeling gross by her own actions, she spoke in soft tones. "I should go." She felt the regret of taking advantage of him, but also she wanted to stay and continued where they left off. 

 

Giving her a lopsided smile, he gave her a sloppy kiss on the lips, pulling her waist down one more time, arms wrapping around her carefully. "Go, we will be fine." He stated, watching her get up and head upstairs. 

 

Once in her room, she glanced into the mirror and saw how he had messed up her hair. Little makeup she had on was smudge and the mark on her shoulder. That made her do a double take. He gave her a hickey. 

 

Blush dust her face and seem to travel down her body. Cleaning herself, she got ready for bed, giving up on guys for that night. All but one that was asleep downstairs. Though sometime during the night, she woke up feeling warm arms wrapped around her. Looking at her clock it was still early morning. Around four in the morning.   
  
Turning to see who was in her bed, she was surprised to see a showered and clean Herman was laying there, arm thrown loosely over her waist. He smelt good and tempted her to move closer to him. Though she had to knock that thought out, sitting up quickly. "Herman, what are you doing in here?" She gasped out, seeing the dirty blond turn to his side to look at her. 

 

His dark blue eyes were groggy and sleep still pulling him to go back under. "I was asleep." He commented, before pulling her down next to her. "Asleep next to the most beautiful girl I have ever seen." He added, groggily and tucking his face into her hair.   
  
"My brothers are going to kill you." She commented. 

 

He snorted, agreeing, but not getting up. "Herman, you have to go back downstairs. At least sleep in Alex's old room," She tried to talk him into leaving her bed. He snorted, pulling her closer to him, "Please, Herman, I don't want them to kill you." She pleads which made him look down to her worried eyes. Giving her a deep kiss, his teeth grazed across her bottom lip before his warm hands went to her waist and fingers slipped under her sleep shirt. "Herman," She gasped, feeling his heavy weight on top of her, but he was careful not to squish her. 

 

Watching her actions carefully, Herman left her with another kiss that left her breathless and reaches up to feel how sore her lips seem to be. The next day the group had seen them off to training. Feeling Herman's eyes stay on her, she got the sinking feeling he didn't forget the night before. "Hey, I want ya to write to me, okay?" He stated, placing a hand under her chin to look up at him. "I don't care how little of what is going on, just write to me about anything." He breathed out. The families seemed to be farther away, dipping down, his lips softly grazed over her own. 

 

Giving him a small smile, she kissed him back just as softly. "What of Alex? Also our age and...-" He put a finger on her lips to make her freeze. Running the finger across it softly he gave her a small smile. 

 

With a sigh, leaning forward till their foreheads touch much like how they used to do when they were younger, he gave her a pointed look. "One step at a time. As of right now, we are not together, but when you turn eighteen you are going to be mine." He explained, giving her another soft kiss. "Just three more years." He hummed then turn to walk to the group that was looking for the pair.   
  
Waiting a couple of minutes, she followed him to where the group is. Giving both Alex and Herman hugs for goodbyes, she squeezes a little tighter on him. "Three years." She mumbled mostly to herself than to him. He gave a small smirk before leaving the families there. 

* * *

 

 **YEAR:** 1990

 **AGE** : 16 Years Old

 

Sitting at the table, she had gotten a letter from Alex saying he wouldn't be home till a week later than thought. She didn't know what was keeping them, but because of that, they were going to miss her birthday. Shifting in her spot, she frowns at the letter, this one from Herman saying the much same thing and wishing her a happy birthday. 

 

Spending the day with her friends, she enjoyed the time they all spent together. Even went to Lodi's strip mall for the day. Getting a new dress, though she didn't see the point in it, it was her friends who stated she needed one. Something about a special boy and how they all know she has one. She keeps telling them it is a misunderstanding, which upsets them when she tells them that.   
  
"Listen, you already hurting our feelings by not telling us who he is, don't insult us by saying that we don't understand." A blonde stated, snapping her fingers at Josephine. This was Ember. They have been friends since dance class, that was till she was kicked out. 

 

The pair became good friends anyway and her other friends were more Ember friends than her own. They seem to only like Josephine when Ember is around. Which made sense since they were the higher end of the social ladder. All of them were from families with money, while Josephine was the town's drunk daughter. 

 

Shifting in her spot, she tried to pay for the dress, but Ember wouldn't let her. The blonde stated that it was her birthday present. She was hesitant to accept but did because there was no talking Ember out of buying the dress. 

 

Getting to the house, Josephine with help of Ember got into the dress and got ready for the party. Of course, Josephine had told both her brother and Herman about it and sent them birthday invitation. Her mother was bleeding her father dry for this party. She didn't even want one because the two most important people in her life weren't even going to be there. 

 

 Walking down the hallway in the fire station of Charming to where everyone was, she didn't want to be here. It was almost like a coming out party for her. She hated it because the two people who she cares more for wasn't there. Not even her parents she loved as dearly as those two. 

  
Colleen, Alex's wife, stood there with her belly big and baby on her hips watching her with a pointed look almost. Into the other area where her guests were, she felt out of place. Forcing a smile on her lips and pretending to be happy to be surrounded by most of Charming who she doesn't care for. 

 

A soft sigh, she sat down in a chair, slumping only a little. If her mother noticed she would have been scolding Josephine to sit right. She really didn't want to do that right now. Her feet hurt from the heels, the dress was starting to stick to her from the sweat of dancing with every guy that her mother sent her way. Whenever she turned a dance down her mother would scold her and then send her off to dance with the boy she turned down. 

 

This was not the day she was expecting ahead of her. She didn't even want a party. Feeling the eyes of some of her guests upon her, she froze. Wasn't just some, it was nearly everyone. Even a few of the mechanics that work with her big brother before he joined the Marines were there.   
  
Getting up, she walked to where everyone was glancing between her and the place at the door. Farther she got, the more her gut said to run to the door. Standing there was both of her boys. Her big brother Alex who was holding his child and cooing at his wife's belly before seeing Josephine. Next to him was Herman who walked forward, eyes staying only on her even though her ex-dance teacher seem to try to gain his attention. 

 

He reached down, taking her hand in his bigger one and gave her one spin which made a real smile cross her lips and giggle escape. Warm smile and eyes lighting up at her reaction he pulled her into a big, warm, embrace. One that she notice of his shoulder that made her eldest brother frown. 

 

Tightening her hug to him she let go and walked under his arm, holding his hand till he was just out of her reach and then hugged her big brother in much of the same fashion. She loved them both, a kiss on the temple, he seemed to be debating something in the back of his head. Eyes calculating before he sighed. "Nothing I can do, is there?" He finally asked shoulders slumped a little. 

 

Shaking her head, she didn't even bother trying to stop what she was going to say or hide how she feels. "Not really, I love him. I really do, Alex." She stated, holding him tightly not wanting to see the facial expression he was giving Herman. 

 

Once let go and took a step away, Josephine watch in slight horror and amazement of Alex walking straight to his best friend for over a decade and punch him once. It was hard enough to knock him over and busted lip. Rubbing where he was hit, Herman nodded his head. "I deserved that." He finally commented. "Done?" He looked up to his friend with a spark of respect that couldn't be explained by anyone there. 

  
"For now," Alex stated, holding his hand out to Herman to help him up. 

 

Upon getting up, Josephine handed Herman a few paper towels where he cleaned up the blood and then scoop her up in a tight hug again, spinning her as if she was his personal ragdoll. She laughed, holding onto him and then he put her down. When music was started up again, none of the boys her age or even around her age could get her away from Herman for longer than a minute.   
  
Her mother had enough and even snapped at her which earned a glare from both Alex and Herman who told her that Josephine has no reason to dance with anyone she doesn't want to. That made the woman reach out and slap Alex when he spoke it but when she went to hit Herman Josephine stepped between them. She took the blow for Herman to his surprise. 

 

"Don't you fucking touch her!" Alex snapped, grabbing the woman by the throat. "She has done nothing but everything you have asked her. She has risked her fucking life for you." He growled between his teeth. 

 

Herman leads her away, outside the blue car that Josephine always loved waited for them. Alex road on a bike in which let Josephine escape with Herman easier. The next day she has awoken in Herman's bed with one of his oversize shirt on and rubbing her face softly. "Morning," Herman grumbled, wrapping his arm around her middle and force her back to his warm chest. 

 

Laughing softly, she turned to face him. "I enjoy waking up next to you." She stated, curling up into him. 

 

Hearing a knocking on the door, he groaned, before motioning for her to get dress. Alex brought her over some clothes and when Herman left, she smiled. They didn't have sex, though she was hopeful. He said that she wasn't ready and they just need one small thing for her mother to get him arrested. That isn't something that either of them wants. 

 

Dressed she could hear the cop outside stating that her mother wants her to come home. "It is up to her. I didn't force her to leave." Herman state.

 

The older man sighed. "I know, I was there and saw, but Herman she needs to go home eventually." He commented. 

 

"She's abusive," An older female voice stated, Josephine, walked into the doorway. The older man was about her father's age, looked up at her then to the woman who spoke. He looked worried at both of them. The sweats that she wore was comfortable and made her feel relaxed wearing. "Plus we are just across the street, she could have come here herself." The older woman added, her blonde hair graying. 

 

With a groan, the man's head lulled back. "Ms. Charlotte is right," Josephine stated, stepping forward. "She is abusive, always have been. Many times I found safety in the Kozik home as did my brothers. Never physical to me, but can't say to the same for my brothers." 

  
The man sighed, holding his arm out for the teenager. "Come on, Josephine, we should head across the street before your mother tries to press kidnapping charges." The man stated. 

  
"Wayne, that isn't right that...-" The look the man shot her made Charlotte stop. "Please, just give her a couple more minutes, she just woke up." Charlotte tried to reason. 

 

With a groan and nod, Unser waited for Josephine. Walking back into Herman's room, she pushed her clothes into the plastic bag her sweats came in, then a ghost of breath on her neck made her look back to the man who had his arms snaking around her waist. "Want me to sneak in tonight?" He wondered, placing a kiss on her temple. 

 

A small smile crosses her lips before kissing him ever so softly, "I would like that, but Alex will probably try to kill you." She reminded him. 

 

Shrug of his shoulders, Herman smirked down at her, "Alex is staying with his wife, so I doubt he will notice who is sleeping in your bed." He commented, which made her snort. 

 

 Getting across the street, Herman stayed close to her. Her mother was ripping the house apart screaming bloody murder when Unser came by with the couple. "Samantha, you will have to calm down!" he called out trying to get the woman to stop screaming at her husband who seemed to be barely able to stand much less fight the woman who was throwing things at him and ripping the house apart. 

 

Gripping Herman's hand tightly, Unser was able to get the woman to calm down. She was breathing hard and glaring at her husband from over the cop's shoulder. "Josephine, you ungrateful whore, pack your bags." She commanded. 

 

Holding her father up, Josephine looked to Herman before back at her mother. "No." She spoke. Unser had let go the woman thinking she was calm again. Getting her father to sit down in the kitchen chair that wasn't broken from her mother's rampage the woman came storming over hitting Josephine hard enough across the face that Unser was in shock. 

 

"Say that again to me!" She demanded. 

  
  
Standing up, Josephine had tears in her striking blue eyes as she looked into her mother's own eyes. "No, I am not packing my bags. I am not leaving him like this. You are no good filth of a woman. If it wasn't for Ms. Charlotte and the Kozik and Alex I wouldn't understand the abuse you do. How you treat others. How you treat the man who gives you everything you want." Josephine snapped. 

 

The woman got more pissed at every word that left her daughter. reaching out to slap the girl again, Herman caught her hand. "You ain't touching her again." He commented, before letting the woman's arm go. 

 

The weeks after her mother left, Josephine dropped out of anything that cost extra money for her family, pick up a part-time job and tried to help her father. His drinking went from twice a week to almost daily after her mother left them. Eventually needing money to become the only thing that matter to her. Deciding to get a GED she dropped out to support her father.   
  
One day while her father was sleeping off another night of drinking, she was watching her nieces with Herman. Sitting on the floor playing with the one-year-old, he was feeding the infant in his arms. Watching her as she played with the other girl, he couldn't help but smile and wondered if this is how it would be if they had kids together. 

 

She couldn't help but wonder the same thing seeing him coo and them and play. Finally able to put them both down for naps she crawls over into Herman's lap and laid with her head on his chest. "You two better have clothes on!" Alex stated, walking in with a hand on his eyes which earn a pillow thrown at his head. Uncovering his eyes he saw the two curl up together while his daughters were asleep in the play pin. "Oh, good, you two are dressed. Hungry?" He asked, holding up his other hand which had a bag of take-out food in it. 

 

Laughing softly, the two got up and took the food into the other room. They didn't want to wake the babies up. Eating, the three, couldn't help but jump subjects. Josephine listen when they were talking about mechanics and bikes. They were talking about after their three years are up to join the local MC which was at the TM and she didn't know how to feel about that. 

 

Being so much younger than them, one of the few people in this town that would get it would be Gemma Teller, but she wouldn't want them to be around what is essentially a gang. Shifting in her spot, the guys went to her GED. Both of them didn't want her to drop out as they did, Alex said he'd pay for everything that they need. Herman stated he'd help too, which Josephine shook her head saying that she wants to help too. She doesn't mind getting a GED and she can get into college still. 

  
Their ten-week break seems to end pretty fast for Josephine to admit. Herman and she were caught in a heavy makeout when Alex had to pull the two away to leave out. Colleen made snide remarks about how she was just a baby chasing after an experienced man. 

 

With a roll of the eyes, Josephine gave her a forced smile. "Love doesn't see age or anything else like that," She commented before walking away. 

 

That earned a snort and look from another woman that was there. The woman was with a young boy about twelve. They were heading from the hospital and just so happen to pass the two women, one much younger than the other. 


End file.
